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Monday
Dec232024

I was only obeying orders

I had two things to do today.

One, pick up the turkey (ordered last month from our local butcher).

Two, go to the dentist.

The latter was just a check-up, following an emergency appointment in October for persistent toothache.

Curiously the pain continued, on and off, for the best part of a month until it mysteriously stopped a few weeks ago.

I was a little nervous that today’s prodding and scraping might aggravate the tooth and the pain would return, just in time for Christmas, but it seems to be OK.

As for the turkey, my wife had told me to “order a whopper” which seemed unnecessary given there will only be four of us on Christmas Day.

Nevertheless I did as I was told and looking at the size of it we’ll be eating nothing else for days.

After that it will be time for the enormous gammon I was also instructed to buy. That’s another four meals at least, I reckon.

Christmas - don’t you just love it?

Wednesday
Dec182024

Death of the corporate Christmas card

For years we used to design and print our own Forest Christmas card.

One year it featured Santa Claus smoking a cigar in a garden shed. The next he was on a sleigh, in space, hurtling towards a welcoming smoker-friendly planet.

My favourite card featured a typical Christmas scene - log fire, Christmas stockings, plus a handful of boxes in plain wrapping featuring the slogan ‘Hands off our presents'.

On the back was an illustration of a sludge brown cracker with a further message: ‘Plain packaging? You must be crackers'.

The Times’ Business Diary applauded us for "mustering some Christmas spirit" in our fight against plain packaging and reproduced both the front and back of the card.

Back then we sent hundreds of cards to MPs, broadcasters and journalists, and each one had to be signed.

It took the best part of a day but we fortified ourselves with wine and mince pies to alleviate the boredom and reduce the risk of repetitive strain injury.

In December 2009, in an article headlined ‘The pubs that died after giving up smoking’, Telegraph columnist Vicki Woods wrote:

In a year when the postman brought me fewer handwritten, stamped and posted Christmas cards, the corporate ones stood out. I liked a depressed Santa sitting under a pub sign saying NOBODY'S INN. It was a Merry Christmas from Forest (the pro-smoking people), hand-signed in different biros by Nicky, Sue x and Squiggle.

Squiggle? That was me!

This year, given the ever increasing price of stamps, we decided not to design, print and post an exclusive card to hundreds of recipients (many of whom may not even be working in an office any more) but to recycle a previous design and email it to the 3,800 names on our mailing list.

It’s not the same, I know, and it’s sad that the long tradition of sending Christmas cards in the post appears to be coming to an end, but there we go.

I still send personal Christmas cards to a handful of relatives and friends I haven’t seen in a long time, but the list gets smaller and smaller each year and I’ve noticed that fewer still send us a card in return.

We’ve received one or two digital cards but while I appreciate the thought you can’t put it on the mantlepiece (even if you have one).

The upside is that we no longer have to suffer the round-robin Christmas letter that was briefly in vogue a decade or so ago.

To be fair, one or two were a source of great merriment in our household, but the general response was one of bitter jealousy that our ‘friends’ had enjoyed such a full year with numerous holidays on sun-kissed shores.

As for their children, I had zero interest in hearing about their first class degree, their ‘amazing’ gap year in South America, or their wonderful new job.

If that makes me a curmudgeon, I’m sorry!

PS. There was a time when I would receive the odd (sometimes very odd) corporate gift from a supplier or business contact.

More often than not the present was an executive toy - a stress ball (‘for mind and body’) or Newton’s cradle - but occasionally I would get something rather more desirable, a few bottles of wine, perhaps.

Funnily enough, the most enduring corporate gift I have ever received was a little red address book I was given as a leaving present in December 1982.

I still have it and two years ago I wrote about it here.

Below: The 2009 Forest Christmas card adapted a stock photo to highlight the impact the smoking ban was having on Britain’s pubs

Monday
Dec162024

Nanny Starmer reimagined by AI

Remember this (iconic) illustration?

We commissioned it in October 2023, shortly after Rishi Sunak announced plans for a ban on the sale of tobacco to future generations of adults.

It subsequently appeared on leaflets, beer mats, and (infamously) a large banner that was confiscated by security guards at the House of Commons ahead of a Forest reception in February.

The banner – which featured multiple images of the illustration and nothing else – was deemed "offensive" and was not permitted on the parliamentary estate.

Anyway, following the general election we wanted to commission a similar illustration featuring Kier Starmer. Unfortunately the illustrator, Howard McWilliam, is in great demand and the earliest he could do it was the end of the year.

In the meantime our web designer had an idea. How about employing artificial intelligence to create the new illustration, similar to the original but with Sir Kier pushing the pram?

Here's the result. Safe to say we'll be sticking with human intelligence for the foreseeable. Watch this space.

Sunday
Dec152024

To pee or not to pee

As I’ve got older I’ve been increasingly prone to various minor ailments.

I currently take two pills a day to combat a swollen prostate, another two to reduce my blood pressure, plus a fifth (the infamous statin) which I think is to reduce my chances of having a heart attack or stroke before I’m 70.

The most painful ailment, when it occurs, is gout. It can be treated but by the time I get an appointment with a doctor to prescribe a drug to reduce the swelling in my foot I have usually endured two or three days of intense pain during which I am largely incapacitated (ie barely able to walk).

Another painful ailment is a recurring bladder infection - once, twice, sometimes three times a year. I’ll spare you the details. Suffice to say that for two or three days it is VERY painful when I pee and even with prescribed medication the symptoms generally last for a week or more.

The pain and general discomfort I can handle. More difficult is the fact that I have to go the loo once an hour at least, while my brain is telling me to go even more frequently so I have to fight the impulse.

That makes it difficult to go out for any length of time, as I discovered last week when I had to attend a lunch at the House of Lords.

Fortunately, all those years of working in London have not been wasted and I was able to manage the situation without too much trouble.

It helps that I know where the public toilets are! My favourite Westminster convenience - for cleanliness and location - are the WCs at the Conrad Hotel (formerly the Intercontinental) opposite St James’s Park Underground station.

I’ve used the facilities so often I’m convinced the doorman recognises me, even though I have never stayed there.

4 Millbank, close to the Houses of Parliament and home to the BBC, ITV News, and Sky News, was another convenient convenience until they changed the security arrangements which made it impossible to wander in and out without being a member of staff or a registered guest.

Anyway, leaving that aside, I was told in October that I am on the waiting list to be seen in the urology clinic at my local hospital.

On Friday I was informed that ‘due to capacity and clinician availability there is a 5-6 month wait for urgent referrals, 12-18 months for routine referral’.

I’ve no idea whether I’m an urgent or routine referral but there is some good news.

The doctor I spoke to last week reminded me that, according to my most recent CT scan (in 2023), there was no indication of significant damage to my kidneys beyond normal wear and tear.

If only the same could be said of our blessed NHS.

Sunday
Dec152024

Rougham ready 

It was my wife’s idea.

Instead of popping down to the local garden centre to buy a Christmas tree, as I have done for 25 years, why not ‘pick your own’ tree from a plantation 55 miles away?

And so, three weeks ago, we drove to the Rougham Estate near Bury St Edmunds in Suffolk where we were directed to a field and invited to choose from the hundreds that were growing - in various shapes and sizes - in neat rows:

Trees from the Rougham Estate are famous for their quality and longevity, having been carefully nurtured throughout the year. We grow predominantly both Nordmann Fir and Norway Spruce and also some Blue Spruce, Fraser Fir and Nobel Fir.

The Christmas trees are cultivated here on the Estate as a sustainable horticultural crop, with thousands of new trees planted each year on about 20 hectares of land. The trees take about 10 years to reach 6ft, providing a habitat for wildlife during the growing years.

But having chosen our tree, that wasn’t the end of it. Oh no.

We then had to select a collection date so they could cut it down two or three days ahead of collection and that meant a second round trip of 110 miles.

To be fair, it was significantly less expensive than a pre-cut garden centre tree, and there was an unexpected bonus because, thanks to a tip-off, we discovered a rather fabulous cafe/restaurant/event space in a nearby industrial estate.

Open Thursday to Sunday, ICE offers breakfast, brunch, lunch, and dinner (except Sunday when it closes at 4.00pm).

The setting may be industrial (albeit in a rural location), but the food and service were excellent. Warmly recommended, should you be in the area, but advance booking advisable.

Below: Breakfast at ICE, Unit 1, Lundy Court, Perkins Rd, Rougham

Tuesday
Dec102024

Born December 10, 1924, Lord Harris of High Cross would have been 100 today

Lord Harris of High Cross was born on December 10, 1924.

That means he would have been 100-years-old today. Instead he died, aged 81, on October 19, 2006.

I was unaware of the significance of today’s date until last week when I saw that the Institute of Economic Affairs was hosting a Ralph Harris Centenary Lecture at Church Hall, Westminster, on December 9 (ie last night).

But it got me thinking about Ralph, who was chairman of Forest for 20 years from 1987 until his death 18 years ago.

I first met him in November 1998. Forest was looking for a new director to replace Marjorie Nicholson, and at the suggestion of Brian Monteith, Forest’s spokesman in Scotland with whom I was sharing an office in Edinburgh at the time, I applied.

I was invited to Forest’s office in Palace Street, Victoria, where I was ‘interviewed’ by Ralph and Marjorie over tea and sandwiches.

While Marjorie was reaching for her fags, Ralph was smoking his pipe and the smoke would drift up and disappear into the large air filtration unit in the ceiling panel above our heads.

A slightly eccentric looking figure, Ralph often wore a deerstalker and was never without his beloved pipe. Whether this was to disarm people, I don’t know.

In reality he had an exceptionally sharp mind and despite his generally equable nature there was a slight air of impatience about him.

His peerage, the first to be bestowed by Mrs Thatcher after she became prime minister in 1979, was in recognition of his work for the IEA, which he co-founded with Arthur Selsdon in 1956.

Selsdon was considered the more intellectual of the two. Ralph was the ‘hustler’, the man who went out and ‘sold’ the IEA’s free market ideas to politicians and journalists.

In those days free market economics were out of fashion, even among Conservatives, and it was 20 years before they were once more in vogue, courtesy of Margaret Thatcher via Keith Joseph and others.

Typically, Ralph chose to sit on the crossbenches in the Lords rather than be aligned with any one party. He valued his independence.

Either way, when I was eventually introduced to the person I knew only as Lord Harris of High Cross (described by the Guardian after his death as ‘A ramrod-erect military figure with a bristling moustache, spectacles, thinning hair, a loud laugh, [and] flamboyant waistcoats’), I assumed he must come from a ‘posh’ background.

Far from it. One of four children, Ralph was brought up by working class parents on a council estate in Tottenham, north London. He excelled academically, however, and went to Tottenham grammar school before going to Queens' College, Cambridge, where he achieved a first-class degree in economics.

Thereafter, according to another obituary:

He lectured at St Andrews University (1949-65) and stood as a Liberal Unionist parliamentary candidate at Kirkcaldy in 1951 and Edinburgh Central in 1955.

The IEA followed and in 1987 he added Forest to his portfolio of interests when he was appointed chairman, an honorary role for which he never received a penny.

He was however far more than a figurehead. In my experience he was game for just about anything.

On No Smoking Day 1999, at the age of 74, he agreed to lead a group of escapees - around 15 people - to Paris, which was then the ‘European capital of smoking’. They left on a Eurostar train from Waterloo station at 8.00am, returning to London over 14 hours later.

The following year, aged 75, he joined me in Scotland for the launch of Scottish Forest, a short-lived attempt by Forest to fully embrace devolution.

We began with a smoker-friendly breakfast fry-up in a Glasgow pub that was broadcast live, with interviews, on BBC Radio Scotland.

We then travelled to Edinburgh where we hosted a reception for MSPs and journalists at the appropriately named Oxygen Bar close to the Scottish Parliament.

Thereafter Ralph attended many Forest events including parties and PR events at Little Havana (off Leicester Square), Simpson’s-in-the-Strand, and the Groucho Club in Soho.

He was active in other ways too. In 1998 he co-wrote a book with Judith Hatton, who was a part-time researcher at Forest. It was called ‘Murder A Cigarette’ and according to the synopsis:

The aim of this book is not to encourage others to smoke, but to sort out fantasy from fact in the debate on the freedom of adult individuals to smoke - always with courtesy and considerations for others. The authors acknowledge smoking as a risk factor in cancer; but as only among several leading predispositions, including heredity, diet, personality, lifestyle, social class and location. They aim to expose the exaggeration and deception of the "medical mafia" and the "cancer establishment" and show "passive smoking" to be a bogus invention designed to stigmatise smokers.

In 2004, while we were campaigning against the smoking ban, he also wrote an essay, Smoking Out The Truth: A Challenge to the Chief Medical Officer’, that was disseminated to MPs and the media.

Ralph and I were subsequently invited to meet John Reid, Secretary of State for Health, and his senior adviser, Julian Le Grand (now Sir Julian), who agreed with us that the threat of passive smoking had been exaggerated.

This led, directly or indirectly, to Reid's infamous compromise – an exemption for pubs that didn't serve food – that was stubbed out when he was replaced as health secretary by Patricia Hewitt following the 2005 general election.

Up to and beyond his 80th birthday Ralph maintained a busy schedule, frequently visiting the IEA office in Westminster and sometimes popping into our office en route.

I was never under any illusion that the IEA was his first love, but he was always available whenever I needed help or advice.

Occasionally he would invite me to lunch or afternoon tea at the House of Lords, and I remember one or two dinners at his flat in Barnet in north London where he lived with his wife Jose (pronounced Josie) who died in 2017.

I remember too visiting them in their second home, a modest apartment in Eastbourne. It was a rather ugly building but the unobscured view of the sea through the large picture windows was magnificent and you could see why they spent so many weekends there.

We spoke on the phone quite often but it was always brief because he was invariably in a hurry. Emails were always signed off with the words ‘in haste’, and that rather summed him up.

News of Ralph’s death, albeit at the age of 81, was a shock because he seemed in relatively good health. His wife Jose, on the other hand, had spent six week in hospital in France the previous year.

(Ironically, that led to him giving up smoking, but that's another story.)

When he died, and despite his polarising political beliefs, the obituaries were kind to him. According to the Independent:

Ralph Harris was the most friendly and least lordly of peers. His easy manner, however, concealed his stature as one of the most influential figures of our age. Along with his fellow director of the Institute of Economic Affairs, Arthur Seldon, he was a key figure in the revival of the doctrines of classical liberal economics which inspired the Thatcher revolution.

The Times wrote:

For three decades at the epicentre of free-market thinking, Ralph Harris was decisive in converting the British political consensus back to liberal economics. He did this chiefly by informing — and often inspiring — an ideological underpinning for Margaret Thatcher and Sir Keith Joseph as they remodelled the Conservative Party after 1975.

The Economist described him as an 'economist and freedom-fighter' while The Telegraph took pleasure in noting that, while he was a director of Times Newspaper Holdings from 1988 to 2001, ‘he was a longstanding reader of, and writer for, the Daily Telegraph’.

Only the Guardian struck a slightly sour note, describing him as a ‘radical reactionary’ and the ‘high priest of the libertarian right, whose creed included full-blooded monetarism, the unleashing of market forces, sharp tax cuts, unrestricted Sunday trading, the castration of trade unions and the abolition of minimum wages, nationalised industries and inflation-proof pensions’.

The obits naturally focussed on his work with the IEA but they also mentioned his role with Forest.

The Financial Times described him as ‘an enthusiastic pipe-smoker … and an active campaigner against increasingly tough restrictions on the freedom to smoke’.

BBC News wrote:

Describing himself as a "lifelong pipe-man", he was an enthusiastic supporter of smokers' rights, writing numerous essays and even a book, Murder A Cigarette, in 1998.

He also campaigned against banning smoking in public places.

He once said: "A lot of people fulfil themselves through sucking at their pipes or smoking their fags. It's part of their personality."

‘In later years,’ commented The Times, ‘Harris was to be heard speaking out against plans to regulate smoking as often as he voiced his opposition to the spread and deepening of the EU.

Ralph's funeral took place in Barnet, close to where he lived. In February 2007 there was also a memorial event at St John's Smith Square in Westminster to celebrate his life.

Organised by the IEA, speakers included Lord Howe (former Chancellor of the Exchequer), Lord Tebbit, Dr Edwin J Feulner Jr (Heritage Foundation), Professor Pascal Salin (Université Paris IX-Dauphine), Alberto Mingardi (Instituto Bruno Leoni) Andrew Alexander (Daily Mail), and Simon Heffer (Daily Telegraph).

Neil Hamilton, the former MP who was forced to resign as a government minister following the ‘cash for questions’ scandal in the Nineties, also spoke. They were friends and Ralph had supported Hamilton in adversity, as true friends do.

He deserved his send-off and although many years have passed since he died his memory lives on. In fact, I find it hard to believe it was 18 years ago because it seems only yesterday that he was breezing into the Forest office before rushing off to his next appointment.

The good humour and fun I remember is all the more remarkable given two significant tragedies in his life - the premature death of two of his three children, both of them in adulthood.

He never spoke about it (not to me, at least) but it demonstrated, I think, his strength of character that he never let personal sorrow overwhelm him.

I didn’t know him long (seven-and-a-half years) but throughout that period he was enormously supportive, and for that I’m truly grateful.

Below: Lord Harris of High Cross (second left) with John Farquhar Munro, Lib Dem MSP; Charles Maclean, spokesman for Scottish Forest; and Brian Monteith MSP and former spokesman for Forest in Scotland

Saturday
Dec072024

Tobacco name drop

Forgive my current obsession with Tobacco Reporter magazine, but I seem to have played a small part in eliciting a statement from the company that owns the title.

To recap: the December issue, published this week, is the last edition of a magazine whose lineage goes back 150 years.

I wrote about it here (Stubbed out - world’s oldest tobacco trade magazine to close) and on Thursday night I posted the link on LinkedIn, adding the words:

Not sure they’ve thought this through. In a hostile media environment, the closure of Tobacco Reporter means the tobacco industry is set to lose a valuable communication tool.

Late last night, having already posted a reply to my post, the CEO of the TMA (which owns the magazine) posted this statement, also on LinkedIn:

I won’t comment further. I’m posting it here merely for your information. (Click here for the original pdf which is easier to read.)

Interestingly, however, and according the final issue of Tobacco Reporter, the US-based TMA, founded in 1915 as the Tobacco Merchants Association, will shortly operate under a new name.

Even the cursory nod to ‘tobacco’ in TMA will disappear, with the company henceforth to be known as the Nicotine Resource Consortium.

How very 21st century!!

Thursday
Dec052024

Tobacco Reporter - final edition online

The final issue of Tobacco Reporter is now available online.

‘An Outbreak of Sanity’, George Gay’s article about Smoke On The Water, the recent Forest boat party, can be found on page 36. (Click on the image, right.)

To repeat what I said in a previous post, I am grateful to George, editor Taco Tunistra, and publisher Elise Rasmussen for their support over many years. Much appreciated.

I understand the decision to close the magazine came as a shock to both the publisher and the editorial team who weren’t included in the discussion.

Strange way to treat people, some of whom have worked on the world’s oldest international tobacco trade magazine for decades.