When England won the World Cup 55 years ago I was seven years old and my family was living in Maidenhead, Berkshire.
The 1966 World Cup is my earliest memory of football although most of what I remember involves being in my bedroom and hearing the roar of the crowd on the small black and white TV downstairs.
The only match I remember actually watching was the final against West Germany and even that was cut short when my father switched off the TV in disgust when the Germans equalised in the last minute of normal time.
Uncharacteristically he then stomped off to the garden and I missed extra time including the controversial third goal and Kenneth Wolstenholme’s famous “They think it’s all over ... it is now” commentary.
When my father returned and turned the TV back on the game was over and the players were celebrating with the trophy but there was no celebration in our house - just relief.
It was another year before I started supporting a football club (Chelsea) and three years before I began to follow international football properly.
I vaguely remember England losing 1-0 to Yugoslavia in the semi-final of the 1968 European Championships but in those days only four teams qualified for the finals and I'm not sure it was even on TV.
Had England won they would have played Italy in the final and that game might have had a higher profile but looking back I can’t recall much interest.
In fact the Yugoslavia game is mostly remembered for Alan Mullery becoming the first England player to be sent off in an international match.
In terms of international football, 1969 was the breakthrough year for me. I think it was the first year every home international was shown live on television and the Home International tournament (as it then was) was compressed into one week at the end of the season.
The fact that every game was broadcast live was a big deal because at that time the only other live football match on TV (annually) was the FA Cup final.
For reasons I won’t go into (OK, I’m quarter Scottish) I supported Scotland and was hugely disappointed when England beat Scotland 4-1 at Wembley.
I watched the match at my grandparents’ cottage in Dorset wearing a replica Scotland kit and I can still recall the scorer of the Scottish goal (Rangers’ Colin Stein) but I have no idea who scored the England goals.
Twelve months later we moved to Scotland and a curious thing happened - I switched allegiance to England and since then my support for the England football team has never wavered, although it’s a lot less intense than it was.
Today I can tolerate losing to almost any country apart from Scotland which I put down to the unpleasant anti-Englishness of many Scots when it comes to sporting events.
‘Fifty-five years of hurt’ has - inevitably I suppose - conditioned me to defeat because when I look back it’s the losses I remember most. For example:
England 0-1 Brazil
World Cup group match, Mexico, 1970
Arguably England’s best ever World Cup performance against arguably the greatest international team of all time, but still a defeat. Watching the match (on our new colour TV!) Jairzinho’s winner was like a knife through the heart, especially after Gordon Banks's famous save.
England 2-3 West Germany
World Cup quarter-final, Mexico, 1970
I didn’t see the match live. Influenced perhaps by what happened in 1966 my father took us out for the day and on the way home we stopped for fish and chips in Perth.“What’s the score?” we asked. “2-0 England,” we were told. An hour later we arrived home, turned on the telly and discovered the team had somehow thrown away a two-goal lead and were out of the competition. What people forget is that it was the first time England had lost to Germany which made it even more incomprehensible.
England 1-3 West Germany
European Championships, two-leg quarter-final, 1972
After the 1970 World Cup it was still possible to think of England as one of the world’s best teams. The defeat to Germany was seen as unlucky and, anyway, didn’t we give brilliant Brazil their toughest match? Two years later West Germany (with the magnificent Günter Netzer in midfield) took England apart at Wembley, live on TV. It felt like the end of an era and it was. For the second leg in Berlin manager Sir Alf Ramsay chose an ultra defensive side that literally fought out a 0-0 draw in what was seen as a deliberate act of damage limitation.
Poland 2-0 England
World Cup qualifier, 1973
Having qualified automatically in 1966 (as hosts) and 1970 (as world champions), England now had to qualify for the first time in twelve years. This defeat was therefore quite a shock, all the more so because two of England’s heroes from 1966 were directly responsible. Bobby Moore gave away one of the goals, losing possession and gifting the Poles a goal, and Alan Ball was sent off, becoming only the second England player to be sent off in an international. The wheels were coming off Sir Alf’s chariot and it would soon get even worse.
England 1-1 Poland
World Cup qualifier, 1973
England had to win at Wembley to qualify for the World Cup finals in Germany. The match wasn’t shown live in Scotland so I had to follow it on the radio - the breakaway Polish goal against the run of play that slipped under goalkeeper Peter Shilton’s body, the penalty equaliser by Leeds’ Allan Clarke, the bombardment of the Polish goal ... all to no avail. Technically it wasn’t a defeat but it felt like one and the memory has stuck with me ever since.
Since then the list of gut-wrenching defeats England supporters of a certain age have had to endure is quite impressive:
England 1-2 Argentina
World Cup quarter-final, Mexico, 1986
England 1-1 Germany, Germany won on penalties
World Cup semi-final, Italy, 1990
England 1-1 Germany, Germany won on penalties
European Championships semi-final, England, 1996
England 2-2 Argentina, Argentina won on penalties
World Cup last 16, France, 1998
England 2-2 Portugal, Portugal won on penalties
European Championships quarter-final, Portugal, 2004
England 0-0 Portugal, Portugal won on penalties
World Cup quarter-final, Germany, 2006
England 1-4 Germany
World Cup last 16, South Africa, 2010
England 1-2 Iceland
European Championships last 16, France, 2016
Against that litany of failure just one victory stands out for me:
Germany 1-5 England
World Cup qualifier, Munich, 2001
Needless to say it merely led to further disappointment in Japan the following year.
Anyway, I shall watch tonight’s match hoping for but not expecting an England win. Experience has taught me not to be so presumptuous.
Also, while many people will say the result is the only thing that matters, that’s no longer true for me.
I want England to win but if Italy are clearly the better team – and win – I will be fine with that.
Although I think England just deserved to beat Denmark, the (very) soft penalty that decided the semi-final was an underwhelming way to win a football match and I found it hard to celebrate.
I would be disappointed if something like that happened again. Likewise if it goes to the lottery of penalties.
OK, I’m beginning to sound like an old grouch but I really do mean it when I say ‘May the best team win’.
As long as that team is England.
Update: The best team did win. Unfortunately it wasn’t England.