I was due to visit my 89-year-old mother in Chester on Friday.
She moved there in January from beautiful rural Derbyshire but has rarely been out of her second floor flat overlooking the River Dee since lockdown in March.
However, I developed a minor (non-persistent) cough (no other Covid-19 symptoms, m'lud) and my wife – who is visiting her own elderly mother in Glasgow next week – suggested I take The Test as a precaution.
The drive-through coronavirus testing centre at Biggleswade wasn't the nearest one to our home but I was able to book an appointment within 24 hours whereas centres in Peterborough and Cambridge couldn't accommodate me for several days.
I arrived at eleven and joined a short queue of cars.
The army appeared to be running the show although there were several volunteers in civilian clothes.
A soldier approached my car, held up a sign, and indicated that he wanted to see my test site pass. It had a QR code on it which he scanned through the window.
I also had to show some personal ID.
He then indicated that I should wind down the window whereupon he handed me a small plastic bag that contained the test kit and a 'Self-test, step-by-step guide'.
I joined the cars ahead of me and waited for a parking bay to become available in the small car park.
Once I was parked I read the instructions and checked the kit which included a swab, a plastic vial containing a small amount of liquid, two more plastic bags (zip-lock and ‘biohazard’), and a test receipt card.
I then had to self-administer the swab to the back of my throat for ten seconds before sticking the same swab up my nose and rotating it for another ten seconds.
The tonsil teasing made me gag and I was almost sick. I tried again and the same thing happened so I gave up and stuck the swab up my nose, rotating it as instructed.
I then had to put the swab in the vial of liquid, snapping the plastic stick in half so it would fit in the small container.
When it came to packaging the sample I got the bags mixed up but that was sorted out at the drop-off point. I then drove home.
According to the instructions I wasn't allowed to leave home again until I got the result of the test, which I understood would be within 48 hours but could be longer.
In fact, I received the result by text within 24 hours and it read:
Your coronavirus test result is negative. You didn't have the virus when the test was done.
(Sorry to disappoint.)
That was on Wednesday. Unfortunately I still couldn't visit my mother on Friday as planned because work (see previous post) intervened.
Fingers crossed, I will be able to visit her next week.
Meanwhile let's hope I don't develop any more symptoms before then. The suspense of waiting for another result (positive or negative) could kill me.